Cabbie Loves Helping, Hates Babies

Earlier this week a New York cab driver was hailed as a hero after dropping a six month old baby at a firehouse after claiming it was left in his cab.

First off, I've never driven a cab before, but I would imagine allowing a customer to 'forget' a baby in the backseat isn't a sign of a very good cabbie. But that's beside the point. Yay for him for taking the baby to the firehouse. Firefighters love babies. It's known fact. Especially when they're adorable.

Turns out there's slightly more to the story though. Here's a summary. The mommy is 14, the daddy is 27. The daddy's sister is 21 and happens to be dating the cab driver, who is 44. To show off some mad math skills, the average male age in these relationships is 35.5 years old, while the average female age clocks in at 17.5. Fantastic. And perfectly normal.

Anyways, the baby daddy and and the baby momma get in a fight and the baby momma runs away. Now, it's never good news when a 14 year old girl runs away from home, but it's somehow worse news when she's not even running away from her parents, but rather her 27 year old boyfriend. The baby daddy can't handle the baby on his own, so he asks his sister to convince her cabbie boyfriend into concocting the ridiculous 'baby left in cab' story. That's what families do, they help each other out.

The baby is now in custody of a foster home. When reached for a comment, the baby's 15 year old boyfriend said, "I'm just glad she's safe. I was so scared for her safety. It was totally affecting my stick ball game."

The cab driver's Chief (it's safe to assume cab stations are ran in the same format as police stations) isn't too angry at his employee's ridiculous actions. "I am looking at a desperate man who was trying to help a desperate family," the Chief said.

As charges file in and arrests are made, it's the baby who gets the last adorable giggle and the most help. All offense intended toward the family, but it's hard to imagine a home that would be worse to grow up with than one with the turds who came up with this master plan.