Two Friends Talking About Mule Boners w/Jimmy and Zane

Jimmy
Speaking of shrink rays, the other day my whiskers were getting a little long, but I ran out of shave cream. So, long story short, I set my beard on fire. Then, as if that wasn't bad enough, some prankster put a kick me sign on my back.

Zane
Sorry about your luck pal but I got REAL problems over here. My foot got all itchy yesterday while I stood in line at the bank so of course I had to dry hump the security guard and poop my pants. Well Golly-Gee-Molly if that wasn't bad enough the lady in front of me got her period and started throwing goddamn fire crackers into the elephant cage!

Jimmy
Sounds like you got more troubles than a mule who can't get a date to the mule prom.

Zane
More like a mule who can't get an erection after the mule prom. But when you stop and think about it, how many mules really need to be running around with one of these so-called "erections", am I right?

Jimmy
You are correct sir. And that's exactly whats wrong with America..too many mule boners.

Zane
I've always told people that we get along so well because of our similar right-wing views on mule boners. Mule boners and the poor. You still think the poor should be forced to work in labor camps building fancy table and chair set for the super rich don't you?

Jimmy
Only if they're whipped hard and frequently.

Zane
You took the words right out of my mouth. Seems like a simple enough idea to a couple of intellectuals such as ourselves but, unfortunately there are them dummy do dos out there with a bunch of "Oh no, don't hit that poor old man!" and "How could you!?" or "Which hole is poop suppose to come out of?" Jeez, I'm not a doctor! Get a dictionary already!

Jimmy
My grand pappy used to sit me on his knee and he'd say, "Denise, there's only two things in this world you need to know; 1. Women folk have multiple holes, use them wisely. and 2. Hold this camcorder still while I nail your grand mammy." I still live by those words to this day.

Zane
Your grand pappy sounds like a wise wizard to me. I wish I could have met him and even possibly worked the boom mic during a filming of his love making sessions. My grand pap gave me some sound advice too. He said "Zane, you look just like a door" then I'm say "I'm over here grandpa. You're talking to the door again!"

Jimmy
consider yourself lucky. My gramps used to get me confused with an outhouse. That turned out to be unpleasant, I can guarantee you of that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



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